Baltimore

Today my class’s student council reps were announcing information about a canned food drive that starts at an event next week and goes until the first week of November.  As usual, the class had more questions that you’d ever think would be possible.

My favorite one was: “Well, what if you’re gone somewhere next week, like Baltimore, do you just ship it or something?”

It took all of my self control to not burst into laughter.  The sweet little student council reps looked over at me for the answer, and all I could do was shake my head “no” while fighting a smile.

I thought, “Surely this child must be traveling to Baltimore, otherwise, why would he ask such a random question?”

So I asked him.

Nope.

He’s going to Florida.

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Classified Staff Appreciation Week

We recently had Classified Staff Appreciation Week.  I put up a list of all the classified staff at our school under the doc camera and had my students write thank you notes.  This was the funniest one of all.  I made the student add the word “probably” after asking, “Have you talked to our custodian and he has personally told you this?”, to which the student admitted, “No.”

And in our custodian’s defense, he never sighs or has a bad attitude about his work; he’s fantastic!

Thank you

My Hair

My hair is in between straight and wavy when in its “natural state.”  I normally blow dry it and wear it straight, but sometimes I wear it scrunched with mousse/gel/hair spray to make it wavy.  Last year and this year, I waited a few weeks into the school year before wearing it “curly style” for the first time.  Both years on the first time of curly style, the comments from students were pretty funny.  This year I had a post-it on my homework check-off clipboard to be ready to write them down.  Here are a few of the funny reactions/comments from students:

“You took a shower!” (I take a shower every day, thank you very much)

“What happened to your hair?!”

“You look curly!”

“You got rained on!”

“I thought you were Mrs. N!” (Me: “Why?”) “Because you have that kind of hair.”

“It looks like you took a shower and your hair’s all wet.”

We’ll see if they have any comments the next time around – or if any of them notice how long I keep my hair in straight mode and how long I keep it curly.

More Snippets

Some more unrelated one liners from the kiddos:

Kid 1: “Do you want to kiss my book?”
Me: “No.”
Kid 2: “Why would the teacher want to kiss your book?  That’s GROSS.”

Me: “Bye!  Have a good weekend!”
Kid: “Bye! I hope you have a good family!  ….a good family…. dinner!”

Me: “Please put your hat in your backpack.”
Hipster kid: “It’s not a hat it’s a beanie.”

Me: *looking up at ceiling* “Sighhhh”
Kid: *looking up too*  “What are you even looking at?”

Forgetful?

One day with my first graders all gathered on the carpet, a student asked me what a word meant (I can’t remember now what word it was).  The kids still looked confused after the definition, so I rephrased it in what I thought was simpler language.  Then another student raised their hand and asked what one of the words in my definition meant.  At that point, I looked up at the ceiling and said, “Sometimes I forget I teach first grade.”  A student asked, “Really?”
(This is a prime example of how literal first graders are).

A few days later, I used air quotes while talking.  A student asked: “Why did you just do that with your fingers?”
Me: “They are called air quotes, like quotation marks.”
Student shouts out: “Quotation marks!  Someone is talking!” (Which is what I had previously taught them).
Me: “Well, yes, usually, but here I was using them…differently.”
Student: “Why?”
Me: “Because sometimes you just use them that way, like to show sarcasm.”
Student: “What’s that?”
Me: “Sighhhhhhhh.”
Another student: “Did you forget you were teaching first grade again?”

One afternoon the next week, I saw one of my students staring at day’s schedule, so I asked her what she was doing.
Student 1: “Just seeing how many things until we go home.”
Student 2: “Just math and……that other thing, then we go home!”
Me: *chuckle*
Student 3: “Yeah, that musical one!”  (It said “miscellaneous”)
Me: *chuckle *
Student 3: “Miss C, did you forget you’re teaching first grade again?”
(This is the same student who asked the other time too.  Apparently he really latched onto that sarcastic comment!)

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